So, I thought i would take a moment to write about a epiphany I had recently that I had only shared with Pat.

We had some "people" looking at us a few months back. Got told that I was to fat for a frontman and that this is a business of no. I hold no hard feelings toward that particular person, but I was fucking crushed. I have been a passionate musician since i was 9. I have been in love with music since a much earlier age. My dream was just to be in a band that toured all over, made enough money to pay bills and eat on and then thats it. I dont care much about catering or eating fancy food or shit like that. its been a dream of mine to write killer music and have fun but when I heard that. All of that shit didnt seem to matter. I felt like I was holding back the band and I almost left for the same reasons. I have practiced my ass off becoming the frontman of this band for so many years now and been the main writer for the last few of those years. I felt that If i didnt loose all that weight and give into the ideal frontman that I would just be left behind. So around Christmas, I knew Billy wasnt going to stay so I made the desicion based on all of these things to just play guitar and get out of the spotlite. Im not braggin but when people found out about this. I got at least 300 emails asking me what the fuck am I thinking? We are the only frontman for this band and the band is known for you being the Singer and that It wouldnt be the same and that the fire would be gone. We tried out a guy who turned into a flake and bitched out. No one really fit the ideal guy and It just didnt feel right to me. I continued to write and just play guitar, but we got a show offer and I was most likely going to have to sing and have Billy fill in on guitar. Once I got up on stage and feel the rush of the crowd and How just talkin to them, I just felt at one with every person in that room. Its strange to really explain but it was a great feeling. The crowd roared when the headlining band that night (chimaira) gave us a huge shout out ( unexpectedly) and they fucking screamed louder for us then any other band that night. I talked it over with Pat why i stopped singing, and he turned and looked at me and said, man no matter what you do, I support you 100% and we got further when we told everyone to fuck off and never gave into crap like what the "industry people" told us how to be. Geoff agrees that I should stay the front man. I am still not sure what the future will hold for me. But for now I will sing this next show with all my heart and soul and make it my own. No one can take this away. So hopefully things will get panned out and we can find a couple of guys to play guitar for us and hell maybe i will stay the singer hahahah.
I kinda wanted to know what everyone elses real honest opinion is about this....

I don't think anybody but like 3 or 4 people will read this!